Qualities of a Good Friend
(and the scriptures they are based on)
- Is learning how to love
(Love is..Patient, kind, doesn’t envy, boast, not proud, not rude, not self-seeking, not easily angered, keeps no record of wrongs, does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth, always protects, trusts, hopes, & perseveres.
(1 Cor 13:4-8) (John 13:34-35) (1 Thessalonians 4:9) (Romans13:8) & more
-Compassionate, gentle, humble, hospitable, & wants to grow in godly character. (Ephesians 4:2 (Eph 4:32)
( 1 Peter 3:8) (1 Peter 4:9)
-Encourages others and builds them up (1Thessalonians 5:11) (Hebrews10:24-25)
-Doesn’t speak evil or grumble about their friends to others. If there is a problem, go to the person and try to work it out first. (Sharing with your mentor or counselor is ok as long as that person is not a mutual friend)
(James 4:11, 5:9, Matt 18)
-Forgives others when they feel wronged. Apologizes when they wrong someone. Learns how to deal with anger in healthy way. Fools give full vent to their anger, the wise quietly hold it back.
(Colossians 3:13) (Ephesians 4:32)
(James 5:16) (Prov 22:24) (Prov 29:11)
-Prays for their friends (James 5:16)
-Is loyal & trustworthy. If someone shares a prayer request or confidential information, don’t share it with another person unless there is permission given to share it. (Prov 11;13, 25:9)
(special circumstances do apply, ex: a crime, someone is in danger, person is suicidal, etc. Use common sense & wisdom)
-Realizes it is good to have multiple friends and is not jealous of other people’s friends. (1 Cor 13:4)
-Has realistic expectations of others (learns who they are and what availability they have and what they are looking for in a friend). Also realizes that not everyone connects deeply with every person. (We can’t realistically connect deeply with a large group of people. We can be kind & loving to everyone though) Look for friends that like to do the kinds of things you like to do and have similar time availability. (Prov 25:17)
-Helps out when another’s life is hard (time & resources will determine what this might look like) One person might be completely on overload and would welcome help. Some friends have the time and resources to help, others don’t. Be considerate to not expect more of someone than what they have to give. Be sympathetic. Simple things like doing someone’s dishes, folding laundry, cleaning their house, making a meal, etc can mean alot to a friend in need.
(Galatians 6:2) (Galatians 5:13) ( 1 Peter 3:8)
-Gently corrects a friend that is doing something wrong. (but first pray about it and wait for awhile.) Faithful are the wounds of a friend. Open rebuke is better than hidden love.
(Prov 27:5-6, Matt 18, Gal 6:1, Colossians3:16)
-Accepts others where they are but encourage/motivates them in their walk with Jesus. However, be sensitive that not everyone grows at the same pace and a great deal of wisdom& patience may be needed.
(Hebrews10:24-25) (Romans 15:7)
-Be humble enough to receive teaching or correction that someone gives to you. Say something like “Thank you for sharing that with me. I will pray about it and get back to you” Then pray about it and get back to them.
(Prov 27:5-6, Matt 18, Gal 6:1, Colossians 3:16)
-The righteous choose their friends carefully, but the way of the wicked leads them astray. (Prov 12:26)
-There are likely many others. Ask the Holy Spirit to help you notice them as you are reading the bible.
Click Here for a printable page
Click Here for "Dealing with Anger God's Way" by Joyce Meyer
Go to the Forgiveness Checklist, Prayer & Scriptures page